Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Not Tragic Sophonie

Sophonie

The name reminds me of Persephone, the almost tragic figure of Greek mythology.
Beautiful, beloved daughter of Zeus and Demeter, Persephone is one day seized by Hades and spirited away to the Underworld, away from the sun and flowers in which she once frolicked.
She’s only a young girl when Hades abducts her, and her mother is furious. Demeter curses the earth in protest, freezing the fields and ceasing growth. Zeus intercedes but Hades has tricked Persephone. She’s bound to him for one third of the year, having eaten devious pomegranate seeds Hades presented her.

Persephone’s redemption is in the Spring. Hades compromises with her return to the surface for eight months of the year.  
So after four months of barren freeze, she’s released for the season of birth, of growth, and of hope.

Like the ill-fated Pandora, Persephone retains Hope.

The Sophonie I recently met is young. She’s 19 years old and the fourth child of eight siblings.
Papa is a carpenter and Mama stays at home with the younger children.
There’s not much money in the household. There are many mouths to feed. Many school uniforms and books to purchase.
If the family fares as many do in this country, they live in very close quarters and food is not a guarantee.

Sophonie is in her ultimate year of school. She hopes to attend university.
She’s the oldest child living at home and, naturally, helps provide.
She learned to crochet.
With the help of her friend Myrline, who learned crocheting from her American sponsor mother, and her thrifty mother, Sophonie undertook the art and can now create with yarn.
She makes bags.

Before I left Ti Goave in December, Myrline (Mee-lynn), an eighteen year old housemate, presented me a plastic shopping bag folded with crocheted bags in varying sizes and hues. I was impressed with the difference in design and shape, and the strength of the flexible yarn.
Myrline dictated prices based upon size, and I nodded, saying I would do my best to sell them, and hating the thought.

I’ve never been a salesperson. Never been a bargainer, a haggler, or an ads rep.
Browsing in a store without purchasing something fills me with guilt. Negotiating prices, even those which are meant to be talked down, makes me highly uncomfortable.
The few times I’ve had to stand behind a table presenting wares, at yard sales or craft fairs or raffles, I’ve squirmed in my skin and held no expectation of purchases.

(This obviously makes it more challenging to fundraise, to seek support for the school and myself as a full-time missionary.)

However, Myrline asked me to take the bags, and said there was no problem if they didn’t sell immediately, but that I could leave them with my mother when I returned to Haiti.

The bags made only one appearance in the two weeks I was Stateside. I remembered to pick them up January 1 before we left for church where I was sharing about the ministry.
A kind church member helped me spread some of them over the table in front of the poster overlapped with photos of Haiti. She then overpaid for one, bold crimson and white, saying it was fit for a young lady.

As folks asked about the bags I pointed to Myrline in the group family photo, appearing as a tentatively smiling slim figure in a black dress. I said Myrline had made them and was selling them to help herself out.
This I thought to be true.

Upon returning to Haiti I learned otherwise.
Yes, Myrline can crochet.
But she didn’t make these bags, and the money was not for her.
“Not for me,” was the first I heard of it, as I gave her the envelope of advanced money. “For my friend.”
“Oh?” I asked, adding a check to the mental list of incorrect preconceptions. Then I told Myrline I’d like her to tell me about this friend.

The other night I met Sophonie in person.
We attend the same church.
Sophonie is not tall, not grand, not loud or gregarious.
Possibly she is more bold when not around a blan, but I saw in her a gentle person.
The most notable aspect of her unassuming presence is her smile. It is bold, it is grand, it is sincere. It is wide and free under her sparkling black eyes.

“She has joy,” Myrline told me before. “She is happy.”

Life is hard for Sophonie. I don’t need Myrline to tell me that.
Life is hard in Haiti. Even the well-off face difficult scholastic standards, competition, lack of medical care and an extremely uncertain future.
Survival is dependent upon Jesus.
As is Joy.

Sophonie has eight brothers and sisters. She is the oldest one living at home. Her mother depends on her to help the household.
She’s obligated to study long hours to prepare for her Philo, 13th grade, national exam. She surely has to clean and cook and tote water. She must wash her laundry and that of her younger siblings. She gets up in the dark and awaits electricity that often doesn’t come. She has no guarantee of….anything.

Sophonie is hopeful. Sophonie is joyful. She has a content heart.
She also has talented fingers and an eye for design.
Maybe you don’t need a crocheted purse. That’s okay.
But at least consider Sophonie’s perspective.
She’s 19 years old and is yoked to a life of hardship and uncertainty, already shouldering responsibilities unfaced by many of today’s older millennials.

Remember the not-tragic Sophonie—a young lady with hope who lives like it’s always spring.



Rejoice in the LORD always. I will say it again: Rejoice!
~Philippians 4:4

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. ~Colossians 3:23-24


Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you. ~Exodus 20:12

Tuesday, January 3, 2017

Pre-Transition Sadness

Let me explain something to you.
Being a missionary is hard.

Brilliant, I know. Groundbreaking, too.
But seriously. This missionary life is not easy.

Of course, I love my life. I love what we do. I love the way we see God moving, providing, healing, and redeeming every day. I love my family, students,  and continuous new friends. I love our beautiful residence and location. I love teaching and reaching God’s children.

But it’s hard.
We do give up a lot to do what we do. We have given up a lot.
I never wanted to be a teacher boxed inside a classroom.
I wanted a farm. I wanted to raise dogs and horses and illustrate children’s books from an upstairs, sun-filled studio in a rambling refurbished farm house.
I wanted to live by the mountains but not unreasonably far from my parents.
I wanted a comfortable life. Don’t we all?

It’s not important, many of the things we’ve given up.
Our preferred clothes and styles. Our favorite foods. Sleeping in and snuggling up on the sofa before the TV. Not a big deal.
The independence is tougher to surrender. Ability to walk out the door unconcerned. To hop in the car and cruise down well-maintained and well-monitored streets. To window shop, grocery shop, get a haircut or visit the bank without hassle or security checks.
English church is harder still to miss. There’s nothing like worship in your native tongue. The ease in following a sermon in your first language. The power of prayer and song and WORD understood without translation.

But people are the biggest sacrifice.
Jesus promised that whoever gave up mother or brother or friend for Him would gain so many more (Mark 10:28-29). Surely He told the truth. Surely we have gained many beloved family and friends in our travels and ministry.
But we still miss our family and friends from before.
Tonight I visited my brothers and underwent the difficult pre-transition phase. A contemplative, serious, solemn, and tear-jerking phase. It’s not a time of regret or hesitation. There’s no doubt in my mind I am where I need to be and God has set a place for me in Ti Goave. However, there is definite sadness in the separation.
There is wistfulness, reminiscences of childhood, fond memories of our times together in younger years, awe at how far we have come and how different our life paths.
Through all the joy and love of my life, I still hurt to be so far from my family.
They are my first family: my parents and brothers. They are the first ones I knew and still the ones with whom I’ve spent the most time.
They are the ones with whom I have the most inside jokes, the most movie references that leave others baffled, the ones with whom I can interpret looks, gestures, and read thoughts.

I still shed tears leaving them. Even if they don’t see.
You needn’t be surprised when I say definitively that I’m returning to Haiti. You needn’t be bewildered when I say comfortably that Beverly and I have no plans to leave. We see a future there and will remain as long as God provides the means.
Haiti is home. We are blessed beyond measure.

However, don’t be surprised at our sadness. Don’t be bewildered at our tears when we leave those we love behind. We still harbor great love for the places from which we come and the people with whom we have long history.
New Hampshire and Texas are home. Korea, South Carolina, and Missouri are home. In all these places is love beyond measure.

Rejoice with us as we return to loved ones in Haiti. Myself this week and Beverly in the near future.
But weep with us too as we consider the great distance between us.

Together let us look forward to our True Home where there will be no more tears, no more distance, no more separation, and no more departures. Where no one will be left behind.

Until then, we carry on, each of us following God wherever He calls us. We praise God for the good times and pray for the strength to endure absence. And we do our best to keep in contact so that none of you forget how much we love you, near and far.

28 Peter began to say to him, “See, we have left everything and followed you.” 29 Jesus said, “Truly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands, for my sake and for the gospel, 30 who will not receive a hundredfold now in this time, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and lands, with persecutions, and in the age to come eternal life. ~Mark 10:28-29 NIV

28 And Peter said, “See, we have left our homes and followed you.”29 And he said to them, “Truly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or wife or brothers[b] or parents or children, for the sake of the kingdom of God, 30 who will not receive many times more in this time, and in the age to come eternal life.” ~Luke 18:28-29